The days and weeks before a wedding are often so frantic that the wedding itself takes a back seat. During that time, we’re so focused on organizing the big day that we neglect to reflect on our relationship with our spouse.
Usually, that’s not a problem. But sometimes it could be, especially if there are warning signs there that we’re about to marry the wrong person. Here’s what to look out for.
They Come Back Home After 1 AM
Your partner might tell you that they’re just going out for a quick drink with their friends. But if they’re getting back in the early hours of the morning and acting defensive, something could be wrong. It’s a good idea, therefore, to implement the 1 am rule. If they’re regularly back after 1 am it could be a sign that they’re cheating on you and don’t have what it takes to commit to a long-term relationship. Before a wedding, a happy partner should want to snuggle up with their loved one, awaiting the big day, not go out and get drunk every night to take their mind off things.
If your partner is going out all the time, it could be a sign of a deeper psychological issue, like histrionic personality disorder. You can read up on the signs of histrionic personality disorder from todaystherapist.net, but in general, it refers to a cluster of dysfunctional behaviors. Histrionic people tend to be narcissistic and more concerned with their own feelings rather than those of the other person in the relationship. They also tend to take more risks sexually and get bored if they have the same partner for too long – obviously not a good thing if you’re planning on getting married.
You Have Feuds With Their Family
Many people get into relationships with people who have lunatic mothers and insane fathers. Under normal circumstances, your partner has the wherewithal to recognize that their parents are insane and can take your side in confrontations. But if they don’t, it can feel like you against “them.”
It’s important that both you and your partner are on the same page when it comes to your parents. If your partner thinks that their parents are great, but you think that they are terrible, it’s a recipe for disaster. Families always win in the end says thoughtcatalog.com.
You Haven’t Discussed The Basics
Romance and passion are great, but when it comes to marriage, it’s a good idea to make sure that you both agree on the basics. What are the basics? It’s things like whether you want to have kids, whether both partners should pursue careers and whether you share the same ideological beliefs. Many marriages break down when couples realize that they share radically different values that cannot be changed. It’s always best to hash things out before tying the knot, rather than after, given the damage that divorce can do to your personal happiness and your kids.
Talk through your differences in a constructive manner and find out in a pragmatic way whether they can be resolved. If they can’t, move on.